Dadelusions

A report datelined Washington, claims David Hasselhoff will use "respect and not overreacting [as] the magic rules that [will] help him bond with [daughters] Hayley, 14, and Taylor-Ann, 17."

The former "Baywatch" boytoy, singing sensation and celebrity show judge credits the video of him drunkenly sprawled on a carpet slobbering down a hamburger for his new maturity as a parent. But it was daughter Taylor-Ann who shot the suces d'youtube so it is difficult not to be skeptical about how much control Hasselhoff will really have over two teens — who like most children are probably at least a step ahead of dad on their worst days.

Amazingly enough, following the release of the video — for which he is now suing his ex and her attorney, claiming they secretly released it to the media — Hasselhoff was able to wrest away sole custody of his daughters from their (B? C? actress) mom, Pamela Bach.

** As reality battles cynicism, and despite his newfound "fitness" as a parent, it seems most likely that over the next few years when it is "boys night out for the Hoff, it will be boys night in for Hayley and Taylor-Ann. **