Laws of Return

Imagine a father who served in combat, serves in the reserves, serves as a policeman ... and isn't allowed to bring his adopted twin sons home because the government builds bureaucratic barricades. Did we mention he is homosexual, whose sons were conceived through a surrogate?

That has been the case of Dan Goldberg, who has been stuck in Mumbai  for three months while waiting for the Israeli government to okay a paternity test and his return with sons Liron and Itai. It took the prime minister's intervention, but welcome home boys.

Sometimes We Feel for the Fatherless Child

Good news for one man is probably bad news for one child. North Carolinian Charles Moody was notified that he had passed (i.e., flunked, in his case) the paternity test and was "99.9 percent" likely to be the father of an old girlfriend's child. The actual results, included with the letter, indicated he was not the father; a bureaucratic button pusher had pushed the wrong button.

However, at least from the conscientiousness with which he went about taking the test and responding to his letter, it is impossible not to think the fatherless child would have been the much better for Mr. Moody's influence. Yes, there are the studies that kids who don't know fathers — 25 percent of Walesians, for example — grow up with a leg down. And it is true that too much dad — as in the tween-porn pic, "17 Again" about a dad who is suddenly very much in his kids' space — is truly, 2mchdd.

Moody, at least from the brief description, seems like a man who keeps his distance but handles his responsibilities. At least one kid could really and truly use that.

And Then the Bear ...

Rock not; Murphy so so the daddy [earlier: Murphy's Law] ... again. Ah, the magic of paternity (tests).

It also another peek behind the scrim at the difference between "celebrity" and real life, or, what Chris Rock thinks at work



and how Eddie Murphy deals with kids while on stage:



** Enjoy the comedy of fatherhood; the tragedy always lurks in the shadows waiting for its chance. **