Piscine Ponderings

To-be dads in a Great Lake tart themselves up like women so they can spread their sperm. Men out of water seem better able to contain themselves.

Researchers have found that Lake Ontario round gobies, the younger single male version, apparently use their female round gobie looks to sneak into a nest of eggs guarded by the older males and to fertilize the next before sneaking out to the next next. On the other hand, men like father-of-three Ian Platt — and his transvestite alter ego, Susan — are content with marriage (and no more breeding) with just one woman. Similarly, Bernie Darling (really) has a 29-year-old daughter, a wife of 36 years, and, according to Australian news, "a collection of high-heeled shoes and a wardrobe full of dresses; 'none of which are green floral minis.' "

It's not clear whether this proves the superiority of walkers to swimmers, but as they say in France, vive la différence!