Incredible Shrinking Men

Somewhere, an article should analyze and headline should highlight that SOMEONE (actually more, unless the ticket was really expensive) went to see "Daddy Day Camp" last week — at least according to the Rotten Tomatoes report of movie grosses through the Oct. 7 weekend.

"The Darjeeling Limited," another-but-better-received picture with daddy issues, was in 177 fewer theaters (196 to 19) but managed to outticket DDC ($.6m to .1m). Not quite sure what this means in terms of father-subtexted features or the general (or movie specific) economic scene, but reviews or not, I was lucky to escape DDC and will probably need to arrange a grown-up night out (maybe just wait for the weekend and sleepover requests to come in) to check out TDL.

** Screens shrink dads. The more they see them in the movies or on tv, the less change of them thinking fathers (particularly theirs) are larger than life. **

Turkey Links Fathers to Sons

Father and son POTUS (POTI?), H.W. and W., are currently holding hands in Turkish enmity — at least according to the more militant voices raised in response to the Congressional vote to offer an opinion that the killing of hundreds of thousands (maybe a million or more) Armenians 90 years ago was not just bad but wrong.

Bush 41 is accused of dragging Turkey into a war and costing it millions in petrodollars, as well as making things worse between the country and its Turkish minority (the Kurds, who received a quasi-homeland on the Turkish doorstep post First Gulf Struggle). Bush 43 is accused (and this one is hard to argue with) of weakening himself so much that a congresswoman with a large Armenian-American constituency (Speaker Nancy Pelosi) was able to push through a resolution that had hardly moved behind discussions stage for more than 20 years.

Of course, Turkey has not helped people's perception of its reasonableness by sentencing a son for publishing the words of his father, who was murdered after speaking of the Turkish "genocide."

** Deny or embrace it, nobody will let you escape a father's legacy. **

Running for First Dad

Within the late historian Arthur Schlesinger's hearing, President Kennedy is reported explaining why the family turned out so well (?): "... no one can say it was due to my mother. ...when [bootlegging scion and diplomat father Joe] was around, he made his children feel that they were the most important things in the world to him. He seemed terribly interested in everything we were doing. He held up standards for us, and he was very tough when we failed to meet his standards. This toughness was important. If it hadn't been for that, Teddy might be just a playboy today."

Let's set aside the thoughts that raises about current Massachusetts senator Ted Kennedy — or criticism of Schelsinger who was on point with much of history but overly enamored by the Camelot mystique he was helping to create — and move back to fathers. Someday current events will be removed from the purview of bloggers and into the bailiwick of professional historians.

And when it does we (if still alive) will learn a little more about presidential wannabe dads and their younguns. A recent scrap of the evidence they'll have to work with comes from a USA Today report that includes info that Fred Thompson's son made $170,000 for three years as an advisor to his dad's political action committee while the PAC only donated $40,000 to other candidates; that the Mitt Romney Five will someday share from a $100 million trust fund; and that the one mom in the race, Ms. Clinton, seems to be the only candidate whose child(ren) is little involved in her campaign. (Rudy G's children are involved, but mostly, it seems, in opposition to his aspirations.)

** With which dad as Pres (sorry Hill) would you be a happy child? **

Some S/B In Custody, Others Should Have It

Dads are not well represented in the public eye by David Hasselhoff. But it is equally true Britney Spears doesn't do moms proud. The point is that while individual cases vary, why should men have to hoot, hyperbole and haul signs around in a circle to attract legal and judicial attention to what should be obvious: individual men can be as bad or good as individual women as a parent and, unless evidence shows otherwise, should be granted equal custodial rights in a divorce.

** And gentlemen, I have a dream that if we get that, maybe, someday, we'll even be allowed by the moms to head up a school bake sale... and maybe the sons of our sons will be in the running for the class mom position. I have a dream. **

Stephen's Believen

Insulting, wrongheaded, smarmy and funny. Colbert on SAHDs from February 2007 (with a shoutout of thanks to athomedaddy who pointed me to this and whose daughter is obviously kinder to him during the day than Things 1&2 are to me so he can stay up later).

** Still much less insulting than "Mr. Mom." **

Book Him, Dado

There was a time, say in Biblical days, when society let fathers wing it. But those times are no more — and that may be a good thing as Adam only had boys (where did everyone come from again?) and one killed the other, which seems a little sloppy, if not actually the product of poor parenting.

Maybe Adam just needed a book. (And to know how to read... and in English, if you want to get technical.) Maybe the whole (Biblical) world would have turned out differently if only Wendell Jamieson's "Father Knows Less, or "Can I Cook My Sister?" and the Mike Linderman/Gary Brozek collaboration "The Teen Whisperer" had been published in time.

Rock of Ages

"It's the best movie," says Thing 2 (still, three days after we sat through it) about Disney's "The Game Plan." Enough people agree (or like me took girls who agreed) to sell an estimated $42.8 million tickets since release and put it into the top spot among movies in American theaters for the second week in a row.

I'd beg to differ, but what would be the point? Not that I wouldn't be supported by a bunch of critics paid to take a look at a slickly produced movie filled with obvious product placements and plotted along standard daddy (i.e., "the Rock") meets daughter (i.e., Madison Pettis), daddy (football hero) loses daughter (ballerina, runaway), daddy (Super Bowl MPV) gets daughter (living happily ever after orphan no more) lines.

Or, as supporting actor Morris Chestnut says, it's a "he grows ... she grows ... beautiful story."



Just as father-child stories always are on Disney's Planet Daddy and often are on planet Earth.

** Rock Dwayne Johnson can actually father — he has a 6-year-old with an ex-wife — but you'd never know if from this movie if the dialogue didn't say so. **

The Big Dance

Do daddy's girls really "save" themselves for someone special? Do fathers really give away their daughters? And can a dad-daughter prom, as the Arizona Daily Star announces, "help drive home message about abstinence"?

The questions arise as it's time for Tucson's fourth annual Purity Ball — and, no,"ball" is not being used ironically — a father-daughter outing that the local Baptist ministry expects to encourage religious-inspired abstinence (part of the ceremony involves a white rose laid on a cross).

Dads serving in their daughters' lives as guide and inspiration is praiseworthy. But there is also something a little strained, if not icky at the level of involvement of dads in their daughters sex lives suggested by the self-proclaimed 24-year-old unmarried virgin who seems to revel in date nights with dad, seemingly unbalanced by a relationship with a single male closer to her age.

** Isn't the goal to teach your children the best you can (deciding for them less and less as they age) and then worry? **