He Was There

Dad wrote his life, but it took his sons to get it into print. That's the tale making it out of Redding, Calif., where sons Mike and Hank have brought to covers their father Henry Woodrum's autobiography, Walkout. In a talk with the local Record Searchlight, Mike said, "I first read the book when I was in my early 20s and as I got older it meant more and more to me." His father's passing in 1990 did nothing to diminish his interest in the story.

Now, with self-publisher iUniverse's help, the book is published and they look forward to Hollywood's call for the WWII saga of Woodrum experiencing the bombing of Pearl Harbor, getting shot down over France, mixing with the Resistance, and playing his part in the Berlin Airlift.

Rereading Dad's Letters

While very sweet, the genre of collecting a father's letters does significantly lower the bar to authorhood.

So, we celebrate new authors Jeff Chostner and Richard Leitman. Chostner collected the letters to his grandparents from his WWII naval pop into "Pueblo Sailor" — actually it was his grandfather who saved them (the lowered bar).

Admittedly, Wayne, New Jersey's Leitman did a bit of his own typing. Still, what carries his book, Dear Roz, are the letters his soldier father wrote his mother from the groundwar in Germany. He may have found out a great deal about his father, following the latter's passing, but it is still his father's words that carry the day, but give his son authorship.

But as we celebrate the authors, praise them for keeping their dads' memories alive, we do regret that what is surely extraordinary material is not being made into books a bit larger in scope and imagination.

Time for the Non-Talk?

Much is made of The Talk ["The Talk" Talk; Blah, Blah, Blah, Sex, Blah, Blah; The Talk]. Less attention is paid to the timing and substance of "the non-talk."

The NT is called for usually in the case of crime and can (or cannot) be led by father or by child. An excellent example of the NT is the one accused Nazi collaborator John Demjanjuk never had with his son about his past. As a result, JD Jr. can insist that it's all an evil conspiracy against Ukranians that has his 89-year-old father on trial for WWII war crimes.

A less exemplary example of the non-talk is that of a Keystone, Colo., boy who did not mention to his father that he would be using the "I am having a sex change" alibi when he was nabbed for using a stolen/borrowed ski pass. Conversely, the father who was going to murder his wife, his son's step-mother, should probably never have brought his son along (or should have first discussed their joint story) as it was the boy who gave him up to the cops.

So, a word (really, words) of fatherly advice: If it's important, get your story(ies) straight ... or don't say anything at all.

Enslaved vs. Freed

"I don't necessarily believe that the truth sets you free," says the woman whose father left her many mysteries about his life before, during and after his incarceration in Bergen-Belsen during World War II, "but I don't want to be enslaved by secrets." Despite that, Vicky Grandon will not share her father's real name when sharing his and her story, continuing his life's lessons of hiding who you are in case "they" are coming to get you.

Not even his name? Really? What's the worst thing you could admit, that your dad is now your "mom," as was the case Emily Wallis tracked down Clive, the man whose affair with her biological mom created the uncomfortable dynamic in which she lived with the man she thought was her father.

Letting Go (?)

With the new year comes the question of what do you let go of to move forward and what do you keep to help you plot your way?

In some cases it's an easier question to answer than in others. So, we applaud Jay Richardson's plan to put a slightly used 16-gauge coffin on eBay to see what bread he can dig up. It's not as if his father,rock and roll pioneer The Big Bopper, will need it any more after being exhumed and (re)autopsied 48 years after the plane taking him to his next gig crashed in an Iowa cornfield.

As quixotic as it may have seemed, it also seems right that John and Bruce Abele didn't give up their search until they found the WWII sub in which their dad sank. He and they can now rest in peace.

It is also clear that Lon Adams, 58, of Metaire, La., needed to share his father with the world sooner than he was willing to. He said he last saw his dad a bit over two years ago when he headed up to bed and that he hadn't checked on him since. Police chose not to accept the story of how they came to find the bones of the 81-year-old man staring at the bedroom ceiling.

However, what should be counseld for Long Beach 5-year-old Dieon Rin? His father has been permanently banished to Cambodia and it is not clear if they will ever get a chance to see each other again. Does he let go and begin to build his life or does he never let go of the dream of being reunited?

It's a new year. Which way is the right way to go?